‘Will you marry me?’ seems and sounds much more than four words. It’s no small decision, to say the least. But once you’ve decided to go down on one knee and decided that the moment to ask someone to spend the rest of their life with you has come, saying and doing the right things matter above all things. While we’re pretty sure that you have a dream proposal or a fictional scene from your favourite movie or book in your head, rest assured that it’s going to be very different.
So how do you make your proposal personal, different, and special all at the same time? Rather than thinking about what to do, there’s a lot of stuff that you shouldn't do that ensures everything is alright.
Don’t make it a complete surprise
We can’t stress this enough, but please ensure that under no circumstances should your partner have absolutely no idea that a proposal is on the cards. You would at least reach that stage in your relationship where you both have spoken about settling down and how you’re going to spend the rest of your life together. So please, have the talk. Furthermore, no matter what the setting is, let your partner have some time to process what’s happening instead of being straight out caught by surprise. They can be expecting you to propose and yet be surprised. The key is how you get that right. Taking care of one step just takes care of the other.
Don't ignore what your partner wants
Remember that the proposal is about you and your partner. Not just you. You could want to have your family or your friends watching as well, or do something that will get a lot of likes on social media, but is that something your partner wants? Respect their boundaries, personalities, and insecurities, and plan your proposal in a manner that doesn’t leave them embarrassed or ignored. And if you’re still confused about their reaction, not going public is the safest thing to do.
Don't memorise a big speech
Love makes you want to say a lot of things to your partner, and a proposal is surely going to make you want to tell them how special they are in your life. While you’ve memorised all those lines, the longer your speech is, the higher the chances of you forgetting what you want to say. So keep things short and sweet and speak from your heart as you have a conversation in such a way that builds up to the big moment.
Don't hide the ring
Ice cream, a plate of fudge, a glass of champagne—the list of options where you could hide the ring is endless. Your ring certainly deserves better. Plus, it’s very unhygienic and risky, along with there being a high chance of the ring getting lost.
Don't combine it with another occasion
Your proposal should be a standalone event. Don’t combine it with a birthday, Valentine’s Day, anniversary, family dinner, etc. You don’t want other external factors and/or people to overshadow what is to be a very special and intimate moment of your life.
So how do you make your proposal personal, different, and special all at the same time? Rather than thinking about what to do, there’s a lot of stuff that you shouldn't do that ensures everything is alright.
Don't over-plan or complicate matters
It’s completely natural for a person to worry, be anxious, over-analyse the situation, or go to their friends and family for advice. After all, you want the occasion to be nothing but the best and special. Too many cooks are going to spoil the cooking and leave you more nervous and lost than before. A good thing to do is limit this number to a maximum of three or four of your closest people. At the same time, just stick to your gut feeling because no one knows your partner better than you. Furthermore, keep things realistic. Don’t bite more than you can chew by planning a grand gesture you can’t execute. Also, play the situation in your head, as doing so will make the proposal less stressful.
Don’t forget to record the moment
We live for the gram; aren’t we ready to let the world know about every single moment of our lives? There’s no way you’d want to leave this moment out. Add to that, don’t immediately post it. Allow yourself and your partner to savour what just happened. Your followers can certainly wait. Even if you don’t want to upload it on social media, you’d certainly want a photo or video of when it happened just for you and your partner.
Don’t forget to kneel
It sounds corny and clichéd, but no proposal is complete without one partner having the ring in their hand, going down on one knee, and popping the question. Make sure that you’ve got the exact location locked in at the venue for this to happen and speak to the person capturing the moment. And while those few seconds feel like hours, do not get up until the ring is on their finger and they say yes (it also gives the photographer time to do their job).
All images: Pexels
Also read: 5 things to keep in mind while planning surprise proposal
Also read: Unique proposal ideas you should bookmark right away
Also read: 6 low-key ways to propose if a public proposal is not your thing
Home chef Vandana Tomar gives us usable tips and tricks.
Yes, it's okay to do it.
Copyright © 2024 Living Media India Limited. For reprint rights: Syndications Today. India Today Group.