How to convince your your family to let you have an intimate wedding 

When you think of an Indian wedding, the first images that likely come to mind are of grandeur—lavish decor, an abundance of food, a bustling venue with friends, family, and then some more, and vibrant, colourful attire. It's the sort of celebration that oozes joy and extravagance. After all, Indian weddings are known for their sheer opulence, aren't they? But, things are changing. In recent years, many couples are opting for more intimate weddings rather than traditional large-scale affairs. Even celebrities like Alia Bhatt and Ranbir Kapoor, Katrina Kaif and Vicky Kaushal, and Deepika Padukone and Ranveer Singh have embraced smaller, more personal celebrations. 

The appeal of a smaller wedding is undeniable—more manageable budgets, the chance to have your closest family and friends around, and more quality time for yourself. But while the idea of an intimate wedding may sound perfect, the challenge often lies in convincing your parents to downsize. If you’re finding it tricky to persuade them, we’ve put together a few tips that might help you make your case.

The obvious advantage—savings

One of the most practical reasons for opting for a smaller wedding is that you'll save more. A reduced guest list means less money spent on invitations, catering, décor, and venue size. You can allocate the savings to other important aspects, like your honeymoon, a down payment for a home, or even putting it toward your future together. Imagine being able to start your married life without the weight of wedding debt hanging over you. If your parents are worried about the traditional grandeur, you can show them how this more minimalist approach doesn’t mean less love or excitement—it simply makes the event more affordable and manageable. 

More time with your close ones 

A smaller wedding means you can truly spend time with the people who matter most. With fewer guests, you’re not running around trying to manage several hundred different people or making small talk with acquaintances. Instead, you can focus on the more meaningful moments with your closest family and friends—those who have been there for you when it mattered most. You’ll have the luxury of quality time, whether it’s chatting with your best friends over dinner, enjoying the heartfelt toasts, or simply being present in the moment. Walk your parents through this scenario. 

Find a middle ground 

If convincing your parents for a small-scale wedding seems like a rather difficult task, consider finding a middle ground that works for them and for you. You could have an intimate ceremony with just immediate family and close friends, then follow it up with a larger reception or party for extended family and friends. This way, you get the intimacy and personal connections of a smaller gathering while still accommodating those who might expect a grand celebration. It’s a win-win.

Appeal to their desire for less stress (and drama)

You cannot please everyone all of the time, especially when it comes to Indian weddings. One of the best ways to convince your family is by appealing to their desire for less stress. Planning a large wedding can quickly become overwhelming, with countless details to manage, hundreds of guests to accommodate, and the pressure to make everything perfect. A smaller wedding reduces much of this chaos, making it easier to plan and coordinate the details and allowing everyone, including your parents, to enjoy the process. With fewer aspects to manage, there’s less stress on seating arrangements, catering, and keeping everyone happy. 

A smaller guest list also means fewer family conflicts, less pressure to invite distant relatives, and a more relaxed, drama-free atmosphere. With fewer people involved, there’s less room for tension or awkwardness, allowing everyone to enjoy the celebration without the added stress of managing complex family dynamics.

Cultural and family traditions can still be honoured

If your parents are concerned about losing cultural or family traditions with a smaller wedding, reassure them that these can still be honoured. Key rituals like mehendi, sangeet, and prayers can all be part of an intimate celebration. It’s not the number of people that matters, but the significance of the traditions and the connections they foster. A smaller wedding allows you to stay true to your roots, while keeping things personal and meaningful.

Lead image credit: Aditi Rao Hydari/ Instagram
 

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