Vaani Kapoor: on love, life and relationships

Vaani Kapoor is a romantic at heart, even though her on-screen presence in movies like Befikre would have you believe otherwise. We are on a Zoom call with the Brides Today covergirl, to speak about her views on love, life, relationships and happiness, and the 33-year-old actor is uninhibited when it comes to discussing her philosophies. “My parents provided me with a very real and solid upbringing, with strong moral and ethical values in place,” she tells us. “As a result, I am not what you would call an impressionable mind that anyone can sway. My core is strong, and I am very true to who I am.” 

This clarity of thought has found an admirable place in Vaani’s approach to partnerships as well. For instance, when she tells us about how she wants her future husband to be kind, respectful, and share similar core values. Or, how her face lights up when she discusses her desire to help others and spread joy. This is Vaani Kapoor: authentic, content, and raring to make the most of her life. Read this intimate conversation to learn more about what she truly wants in her future. 

Brides Today: What are your views on love?

Vaani Kapoor: I am old-school at heart, and believe that love should be pure and noble. While I won’t call myself a romantic, I grew up watching romantic films that celebrate nobility in love. And I still believe in that. I know this might sound ridiculous or outdated to some, because people have changed the definition of love nowadays...many approach relationships as a means of convenience. But I believe in purity, honesty, respect and loyalty in a relationship because that is the kind of love I am accustomed to. I have been very fortunate to be surrounded by wonderful people—my family, friends, and personal relationships. For me, it is a deal-breaker if these qualities are not in place. 

BT: Which movies have inspired your definition of love? 

VK: I enjoy watching all kinds of romantic films. Some of my favourites are The Bridges of Madison County, movies by [filmmaker] Yash ji [Chopra], which were larger-than-life and so very special... Classics like The Holiday, and many new-age love stories that are great fun to watch. Just about any romantic comedy works for me, to be honest. I am a sucker for romantic films...they leave me feeling happy. 

BT: What brings you joy?

VK: My family and friends. I am close to a handful of people, and each of them means the world to me. I won’t go around making 50 friends; I am not very social. My circle is very limited, but I hold on very tightly to those in my life, and I will always be there for them. I follow the same principle when it comes my movies—I will work on a few projects but give each my all. Food gives me a lot of joy too. And I love watching movies; I can binge-watch all-day-long. The simple things in life make me the happiest.

BT: What kinds of food do you enjoy?

VK: All kinds. My friend [actor] Anushka Ranjan lives in the same building as me, and when we are not at each other’s homes, which is all the time, we keep sharing photographs of food on Instagram [laughs]. I am passionate about food and not many people believe it, because I look slim. I enjoy Indian and Chinese cuisines, French fries, pizzas, spicy Korean noodles, sushi, and desserts...you name it! The thing is, my portion sizes are huge—I can eat like a man, or even more than one! You could compete with me and I will still eat more. Which is why I mentioned Anushka, in case you ever want to cross-check with her. 

BT: What makes you sad?

VK: Many things...I am a hyper-sensitive person. I get easily affected by things. However, I don’t show this to others, especially when it comes to issues that deeply affect me. I try to stay in control with bigger issues, but sometimes the small things can get me worked up, especially if it is regarding someone I care about. 

BT: What has been your greatest learning over the past year? 

VK: I have learnt to be more aware. And to be grateful. I know this sounds very philosophical, but it is true. I have been reading a lot—The Buddha in Your Mirror, Open by Andrea Agassi, Think Like A Monk by Jay Shetty—even though I wasn’t an avid reader earlier. And I have discovered that books give me peace, happiness and joy. Over the last year, I also had a very strong, creative itch to try something new, like learning tennis, but then I realised that to even think like this was a privilege. There are so many who have been left unemployed by the pandemic and people are battling many issues...I am grateful that I could be financially-secure, safe at home, and eat two meals. I don’t need many things in life. I am happy with what I have. 

Emotionally, I had some ups and downs, like everyone else. There are days when I feel lonely and sad, because I don’t live with my family. I live alone with two cats—Kiki and Koko—who are the only two walking souls in my home. I miss my friends and family, but I’m coping. We have been FaceTiming to stay in touch, but there are days when I get extremely low...the kind of blues you can’t explain. But then I pick myself up, and I am happy and thankful for everything I have going for me in life.

BT: Does this inner strength find its way into your professional life as well? 

VK: I am a lazy person, but when it comes to work, I am a super-determined girl! If I put my head and heart to something, I give it my all. I value and respect work, a lot. On other days, I can zone out very easily...I can jump from one conversation to the next, and not even realise it, almost like a space cadet [laughs]. But I take work very seriously, and you won’t see me laid-back there at all. 

BT: Where do you get this will power from?

VK: From the strong women I have grown up with. My mother, sister and cousins. I think, on a very subliminal level, I have imbibed these values from them. I truly believe I am very lucky to be surrounded by such strong women. I believe that women, in general, are very determined. And when it comes to proving ourselves, we don’t leave any stone unturned.