How to write your wedding vows

Our secret? It’s got to be ‘write’ from the heart.

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Our secret? It’s got to be ‘write’ from the heart.

Cue: Friends, season 7, Episode 23: featuring Monica and Chandler’s wedding. 
Monica: For so long I wondered if I would ever find my prince, my soulmate. Then three years ago, at another wedding, I turned to a friend for comfort. And instead, I found everything that I'd ever been looking for my whole life. And now here we are, with our future before us, and I only want to spend it with you, my prince, my soulmate, my friend. Unless you don't want to. You go!

Chandler: I thought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever had to do. But when I saw you walking down the aisle, I realized how simple it was. I love you. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with.

The tears were definitely real when I watched this episode. Writing wedding vows can be stressful and overwhelming. Summing up your love and promises to your life partner in mere minutes seems like a daunting task, at the very least. But here’s the thing—it’s also a chance for you to share your thoughts, feelings, emotions, and journey with your loved ones, who have come to celebrate the two of, on your big day. It’s your chance to give them a sneak peek into your love story, and your dreams as a couple. So, if you’re nervous about what to say on your big day, don’t fret. Here is everything you need to know about writing your own wedding vows. 

Get inspired by your favourite songs, movies and TV shows

If there is a dialogue or song that has defined your relationship with your beau, or a special line that takes you back to a memorable date, then we’d recommend using these as inspiration to start off the vows on a nostalgic and adorable note. Don’t forget, you want to make your partner smile, so use these dialogues as a reminder of just how much they mean to you. 

Share personal anecdotes for a dose of laughter

Laughing out loud rarely ever did anyone much harm—especially on occasions such as these. While writing your vows, take a moment to look back at the journey that has been thus far—the moments that made you laugh until you had tears in your eyes, the clumsy moments, the cheesy ones and everything in between. Share lighthearted stories and anecdotes to give your family and friends a glimpse into the real you, and let them have a laugh at those embarrassing moments too! 

Be sentimental 

Don’t be afraid to shed a few tears—it’s one of the biggest, most momentous days of your life. Let go of your fears and insecurities. Write from your heart—it’s as honest and genuine as it can get. Allow yourself to feel the gamut of emotions that may overcome you as your put pen to paper and be sure to express yourself on your wedding day. Put into words just how much you love your better half, what they mean to you and how life is an adventure with them. You won’t regret it.

Share your dreams for the future 

As you reach towards the end of your vows, look ahead. Think about all the things you want to achieve together, all the dreams that the two of you have spoken about during those late-night conversations. Share the vision that you have for the both of you in the years to come and paint an honest but endearing image for a happy, healthy and strong married life. 

Make those promises

Here’s your chance to make a vow for life. Write down those promises you made to yourself before saying ‘I do’. Pro tip: try not to make the speech sound too cliched and cheesy. Make the promises that you truly want to keep—being by their side no matter how hard things get, to love them when they don’t feel enough, to support them in every way and more. Acknowledge that you’re perfectly imperfect and despite it all, you want to give this your best and nothing less. 

Revise, edit and practice your vows out loud 

Once you’re done writing it all down, read your vows a few times over to make any edits and changes. Practice reading them out loud to your best friend, for a seal of approval. If the vows are meant to be a surprise for everybody, then we suggest you read them out in front of a mirror so you’re not as nervous on the big day.